It wasn't long ago that the Christian Mommy Blogging Community (at least the one I feel a part of) returned to the debate of ages: modesty. What makes a modest woman? What is modesty in today's Western culture? Is modesty cultural or timeless? How do we teach our daughters AND sons about what it means to be modest and why it is important? I followed thought-provoking posts by Sophie and Melanie over at the All-Access blog, Veronica at Toddled Dredge (who has posted multiple times on the topic over the years and who's insight I LOVE), and even over at Segullah for an LDS perspective. My daughters are still quite young, but I've always been conscious of the desire to raise them to be modest women, so show their respect for themselves and their bodies by the way they dress. To carry themselves with dignity, if I can borrow from Veronica. I believe it's possible to do so and remain fashionable if modesty is a part of who you are and not just something you chose (or don't).
And then my mother asked me to be her Matron of Honour when she remarries next year.
Have you been FORMAL dress shopping lately?
I don't know who the designers are, but dignified, modest, serene, subtle...these are not concepts they seem even passingly familiar with.
Just try finding a dress with sleeves.
Go on, I dare you.
Actually, there are a few modest designers out there, but their colour and design selection is woefully limited. I bombarded my mom with links over several weeks and she only found one dress that she liked, and it only came in two colours.
Houston, we have a problem. (Part of the problem being that she already went the empire waisted cap-sleeve route with my dad and doesn't want to do a repeat...that eliminates most of the dresses right there).
It's looking like I'll be wearing something strapless. I know, I know, I could politely decline the invitation, but that would break my mother's heart and I'm not willing to do that. I can work around this dress issue. I'm thinking of it as a uniform or costume for my part in the play "My Mother's Wedding". It helps. It also helps that my mom is being quite accomodating, offering to allow me to wear a little jacket so I'll be more comfortable and spending a ton of time talking this out with me (Thanks Mom!).
In the meantime, there is a lot of conversation going on between my daughters and I, at a much earlier age than I had expected to have to have these conversations. I'm not meaning to re-open the modesty discussion per se--as if you read any of the above links you'll find that there aren't too many points left unexplored there--but I'm wondering at what age you had (or expect to have) the first big modesty discussion. How'd it go? How has it evolved over the years?
Also, if you've seen any really lovely, modest bridesmaid dresses that would be appropriate for a beach wedding...we're in the market.