Poor abandoned blog!
After a couple of days of intestinal upheaval last week I found myself needing to step away from the blog for a bit. I was still around online but I didn't feel I had much of anything to contribute. I felt a little panicky on Friday, realizing I hadn't posted in a couple of days, but I let it go. I've noticed that, like anything in life, blogging goes in cycles. Sometimes you have to step away for a few days to get some fresh perspective. I hope to bring you better quality fluff now that I've had some time to myself.
Lots going on around here, much of it blog-worthy, but my brain just doesn't seem to hold it all. My brain seems to abandon me with increasing regularity. I wish I could blame it on pregnancy or something, but I'm afraid this is the new normal. I think I'm going to start carrying a little notebook around to jot things down in. Sometimes there's so much to share and then I sit at the computer and forget what it all was. Or I remember all of it, but since I haven't figured out how to write drafts or set up autoposts in Typepad yet, it disappears after a couple of days. I tried working in Word, but as soon as I told it I was writing a blog post it wanted to publish for me. Yikes! If anyone knows what they're doing, I'd love a few hints.
It's been a busy week, the first of a heavily scheduled summer. School ended on Friday and all is well on that front, except that, once again, the Princess is unhappy with the idea of having to go to the next grade up. The Princess also had her first invite to a birthday party on Saturday. We had fun shopping for that and the Princess loved every second of the party--I had to drag her away! We're always the last to leave anything. Yes, we're THAT family. If we're enjoying something we want to make it last as long as possible, wringing every drop of joy from the fabric of the day. We hate to abandon our fun. Maybe we'll get better at transitioning from one thing to the next this summer. It would be nice to go joyfully from one adventure to the next instead of reluctantly.
There's a Yard Sale/Bake Sale/Raffle fundraiser this Saturday for the classmate injured in the accident* in May, and it's got us all involved. For a few years now I've been saying I was going to have a yard sale and never had the motivation to really work at it, but for this sweet little boy the whole family is involved. We've been busy cleaning and sorting and giving things "to S". Things that we might have held on to are easy to let go of when they're FOR someone special. This isn't strangers at Goodwill, it's not to line our own pockets, it's for a friend, and that makes all the difference. I'm grateful for that, even as I wonder why our hearts can't be open like that all the time. Why must there be a personal connection before we're willing to give to our fellow man? Another mystery to ponder and pray on. It's really been a blessing in our home and our hearts: mine especially. I'm finally letting go of a lot of my baby "stuff" that I've been unable to even think about releasing from my possession before now. I've felt like if I sold or gave away my babies's things I was giving them away, giving us away. They've grown up too fast for me and I felt that if I just kept every tiny dress and shoe I would be able to hold them close a little bit longer. I could rationalize it as being prepared for another baby, but the truth has hit me through this process, and I'm a lot stronger for it. I'm not abandoning my children's babyhood by giving away clothes and highchairs. What I am is making space to better embrace the NOW I have my scrapbooks and my memories, and I'm still holding back a small portion of the most sentimental things, but I'm learning the difference between letting go of things that no longer matter and abandoning the things that do. With every box and bag designated to donate, my heart is lighter, not heavier. It's a God thing.
So the theme of the past week seems to be abandonment. How I'm dealing with it, how I'm definining it, how I'm embracing it. I wish I had better words to describe the process I'm being led through, but there is all of life to deal with at the same time, and my words seem to abandon me whenever something takes on great importance.
And that's ok.
*For those wondering, it's been a long road for this little guy. He sustained a broken back, broken pelvis, broken collarbone and many other injuries in the crash. He was in a coma for a bit and missed his Dad's funeral (so did his mom). I've heard that there's only about a 5% chance that he'll ever walk again. I've also heard that there's no chance. He's struggled through setbacks and heartbreaks, but through it all he's remained his sweet self. The photos I've seen of him in the hospital show numerous casts and bandages and even an eyepatch--and a smile. He looks like a cute wee pirate. He's supposed to move to the rehabiliation centre today and will hopefully be able to rejoin his class in September. They had a video conference with him a couple of weeks ago. The Princess came home smiling and said that he was just the same and still funny. You can't fake that at 6 and I think it says a lot. There have been and will continue to be a number of fundraisers held in many of the small communities in the area. His family is loved and the community is great, but he and his mom could still use your prayers.